Of Hot Dogs, Cool Cats & SOFTBALL 

by Matt Amsden

Following is a slam-bang recap of the 2026 Lake Erie Islands Softball League season, which completed Aug.16th with flash and fury. Here goes:

Meet the New Champ, Same as the Old Champ: Kelleys Island, a powerhouse team which lost only once in 2026 (to Blue Marlin on July 27th), swept the championship series over Boardwalk, winning Game 1, 12-11, and Game 2, 27-19. They hit and field very well, and even in the rare defeat, they don’t complain. Let it be said: Kelleys is a worthy champion, racking up its third consecutive league trophy to cap a terrific season.

Pitching Performances of the Year: On Aug. 9th, Boardwalk and Blue Marlin staged the best game of the year in a playoff semi-final. Boardwalk’s JOHN MURPHY, the master craftsman, spun a pitching outing for the ages. His 4-strikeout effort was a how-to of pacing, pitch location and defending from the mound. Blue Marlin’s STEVE ALEXANDER , meanwhile, survived three Boardwalk homers while surrendering three consecutive walks in Boardwalk’s 6-run third inning, but settled in to allow just four runs the rest of the game. It may be awhile before Mother of Sorrows Field sees another terrific pitching duel to match the Boardwalk-Blue Marlin classic, which Boardwalk won, 15-13, sending Boardwalk to its first championship series since 2024.

Honorable Mention, Pitching Performance: On July 20th vs. Topsy, Crew’s Nest’s TYLER KING had a hard time missing the strike zone. He struck out the side in the fifth inning, which is virtually unheard of in slow-pitch softball. The beleaguered home-plate umpire grew weary watching pitch after pitch pound the strike zone. Topsy batters also grew weary of skulking back to the dugout hitless. An all-around knockout performance.

Most Improved Team: Topsy played two full seasons (2023 and 2024) without winning a single game. When it broke its winless streak in 2025, the team rejoiced with beer showers and team photos around the scoreboard. But 2026 has been a different story. With new uniforms and vastly improved defense, Topsy started to win. Maybe coaxing former Kelleys player “WILLY P” PUSTAI to join the roster was a catalyst. Or maybe it was the evolution of JOJO CENDROWSKY’s game, who went from bumbling beer-league player to a rock-solid defensive outfielder. Topsy earned a 6-and-6 regular-season record and gave Boardwalk headaches before succumbing in the playoffs, both of which seemed unthinkable only a year ago. Vive le Topsy!

Who’s the New Team?: PBB Bootleggers, a new team from Middle Bass, became the league’s 10th team in 2026. And they started strong, winning their first two games (no one can remember a new team winning its first game, let alone its second, too.)

It’s Old, it’s 100% Analog, and it’s not easy: The venerable scoreboard at Mother of Sorrows Field is akin to the hand-operated scoreboard at Boston’s Fenway Park. Which is to say, it’s old, it’s analog, and man, it ain’t easy to operate. But DINO USZAK operates it like a Zen master. Whether spinning the cranky knobs on the reverse of the scoreboard to post new runs, or peering out from behind the board to check his work, DINO operates the board like nobody else. Thank you, DINO!

Who Painted the Numbers on the Scoreboard?: SCOTT McGOOKEY spent roughly 12 hours this summer re-painting the numbers on the Mother of Sorrows scoreboard, which had faded over time and exposure to the elements. Using bright white acrylic paint and a #5 paint brush, SCOTT hand-painted the board’s inning and run numbers, and improved its legibility for all players and fans. SCOTT also serves as an invaluable umpiring resource, reviewing plays with the beleaguered home-plate umpire on request. In years gone by, SCOTT was a coach and administrator in Florida’s Dixie League (a rival organization of Little League in the South).

The Official Scorer is My Dream Date: JODY AMSDEN keeps track of every at-bat at Mother of Sorrows Field. As the official scorer (and wife of the beleaguered home-plate umpire), she is impossible to argue with. Just take what she says as the gospel: every out, every run is dutifully recorded in her scorebook. Thank you, Jody! (P.S. At last, I forgive you for SAYING NO to my prom invitation many years ago.)

Shooter McGooter: SUSAN BYRNES, mother of recent DePaul graduate KATE (2022 PIB School valedictorian), spent what few hours she has available shooting action photos at Mother of Sorrows. Standing in the hallowed footsteps of Sports Illustrated photographer NEIL LEIFER (the guy who shot Muhammad Ali with his hands raised in victory over the prone figure of Sonny Liston), Susan could make a still-life of fruit look action-packed. Thank you, Susan! 

Groundskeepers, Take a Bow: Topsy’s DAVE SHAFER  dragged the infield at Mother of Sorrows Field before most games this summer. He joined the MURPHY family (JOHN, PADDY and MICHAEL) in providing groundskeeping duties. ZACH KOWALSKI of Yardworks (and Boardwalk) cut the outfield grass all summer long, come rain or shine. And JAC ALEXANDER joined DAVID HILL to pull weeds from the infield dirt early in the season. To paraphrase a faded American politician, “it takes a village” to keep a softball field in working order, so thanks, brothers!

I Pledge Allegiance: Deacon JIM O’DONNELL of Mother of Sorrows Church led teams in prayer before many games this season. Whether players were deeply spiritual or rootless zombies, they all benefited from a moment of prayer. JIM also led teams in reciting the Pledge of Allegiance prior to the July 1st game, honoring our nation before its 250th birthday.

The Boss: He won his only starting pitcher performance for Boardwalk on July 26th, which highlighted his 51st year as a player in the Lake Erie Islands Softball League. Call him Player Emeritus if you must, or just call him BILLY MARKET. Either way, like his father, that dude’s The Boss.

Ketchup, Onion & Mustard — Off to the Races: On July 26, the Hot Dog Races returned to Mother of Sorrows Field. KUYER “DADDIO”” FAZEKAS (Onion), his wife DEBRA (Ketchup), JOJO CENDROWSKY (Mustard) and “WILLY P” PUSTAI, who competed in a baffling lobster suit, all ran to the checkered flag, held by Topsy’s BEAZ FAZEKAS at home plate. Onion chopped its way to victory. Children, dogs and adults all cheered. Awesome!

JFK and General Patton Visit Mother of Sorrows Field: A walking history lesson is provided before each Middle Bass Dockers game by pitcher/catcher JACKSON SHELLER . A history buff, JACKSON performs the pregame fire-up speech to his team, reciting famous speeches from JFK and WWII field general George Patton, among other historic figures. “Look, man, I dig history, you dig?” JACKSON  said, cleverly using “dig” for more than one meaning in a seven-word response. 

My Nickname Changes Every Year — Who Am I? Two years ago, Middle Bass shortstop COLLIN SCHNEIDER confronted me on-field about an error I’d made covering a Dockers softball game. I had been told by mischievous Dockers’ fans that COLLIN was then 12 years old, and I included that “fact” in a game story. Here’s a transcript of my short discussion with COLLIN: 

HIM: Are you the guy who writes the softball stories in the Gazette?

ME: Yes.

HIM: Dude, I’m 15!!!

His delivery of the last line was classic teenager-speak, filled with angst and woe and indignity. Ever since, I have nicknamed COLLIN by his current age, which in 2026 is “ONE-SEVEN.” Next year, when he’s “ONE-EIGHT”, I’ll be “SIX-EIGHT”. Damn, kid, enjoy your youth. Believe me, it’s fleeting.

Theater of the Bizarre: Every season produces its oddball plays, and 2026 had a few head-scratchers, like these: On opening night of the playoffs (Aug. 3rd), Middle Bass’ “PIB ROB” LASOTA hit an infield pop-up vs. House, but no House infielders seemed to notice. No one moved toward the ball at all, and it fell harmlessly to the infield dirt for a single. •  Rattlesnake Island catcher HRISTO MIHAYLOV is an imposing ball of muscle. He is also hard-headed, literally: On July 27th he fielded a throw from the outfield to home plate with his forehead. The ball, traveling over 50 mph, bounced off HRITSO’s noggin on the fly with a wood block-like sound. Unhindered, HRITSO grabbed the loose ball and tagged out Joe’s Bar’s MARTIN HERRAZO.  •. Two plays that resulted in player injuries should be noted: Joe’s 2B COREY WILLIAMS was struck in the mouth by a bad-hop ground ball on Aug. 3rd. He approached the beleaguered home-plate umpire asking for time-out, but his speech was garbled due to having a mouthful of blood. COREY suffered two loosened teeth on the play. Also, Bootlegger pitcher TODD KERIN was involved in the hardest collision of the season on Aug. 3rd as he fielded a throw to the plate and collided with Crew’s Nest’s KEVIN DRAKE. TODD, one of the league’s senior players, admirably remained vertical after the collision, but suffered a mouth laceration when a lower tooth was pushed through his lower lip with the force of the impact. He required an injury time-out, but remained in the game.

Offensive Player of the Year (OPOY): This is unusual — this year’s offensive POY was last year’s defensive POY. So I suppose it’s safe to say that Blue Marlin’s DEVON DOHANOS has a unique, high-ceiling all-around game. Nobody in the league can hit a bad pitch (or a good pitch) further than DEVON. A natural left-handed hitter, he hit an opposite-field home run on July 29th at which the beleaguered home-plate umpire still marvels. Nobody generates more torque with his home-run swing (for all graybeards out there, think Reggie Jackson in his Oakland A’s days). For his highly entertaining at-bats, DEVON is the 2026 OPOY.

Defensive Player of the Year (DPOY): ANDERSON MARTIN of Middle Bass plays in the oven that is left field at Mother of Sorrows.  Never in shade until after 8 p.m., left field at Put-In-Bay’s ballpark requires players to shade their eyes with their mitts or risk sun blindness. Still and all, ANDERSON played nearly flawless defense for the improving Dockers. He was also a finalist for OPOY, so, like Mr. DOHANOS, ANDERSON has an all-around game that rattles the heart of softball fans on both islands. Congrats, ANDERSON! (Home-plate umpire’s note: You’re also very tall.)

Fan of the Year: TERRY FREEMAN almost never misses a softball game at Mother of Sorrows Field. He arrives early in his custom Cadillac golf cart and dispenses wisdom and grooming tips to everyone within earshot. His wife Meriam (happy birthday on Aug. 9th, Meriam!) and daughter Kelly occasionally accompany Terry, but unfailingly, he is surrounded by friends behind the plate, enjoying a cigar and maybe a beer, and always honking the Cadillac’s horn when inspired play on the field meets his approval. For this, along with his rally-cap antics and more, TERRY is our Fan of the Year 2026.

Parting Words of Wisdom: Stop hangin’ around with those friends of yours, they’re a bad influence. •  Motorcycles are fun: Avoid!  • Girls: the cute guy who runs the Tilt-A-Whirl at the traveling carnival is NOT a potential mate.  •. Boys: While dating, carefully consider all cash outlays relative to your budding relationship. Despite her many charms, she doesn’t NEED a new BMW.  • As a bloviating windbag once said, “These are the times that try men’s souls.” Or, “A stitch in time saves nine.” Or, “’Gilligan’s Island’ was just a cheap rip-off of ‘Leave It To Beaver.’ The title character was everybody’s ‘little buddy’. Big deal!”